i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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