After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
