So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
