White coat. Heels.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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