Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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