Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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