so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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