Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
