i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I need to align my fucking chakras
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
