I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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