my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize