i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
