like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
