The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
