I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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