Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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