I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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