We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
