Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
