We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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