Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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