You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
