and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
