508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
