Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
