im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
