So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
