Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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