My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
