Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
