thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
The uberlube is also flammable
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
You don't make any sense
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