She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
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