The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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