Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
