honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
