the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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