i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
