South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
