Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
