She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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