I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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