I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Less talking, more tequila
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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