butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
