is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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