Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
