Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
