No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
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