She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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