'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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