super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
